The week started out much better than it's ending, workout wise anyway. My diet is off the charts too. I don't know if it's cuz I feel rough physically, not from workouts, but ... well from a medical standpoint. I am hoping it's cuz the last time I had my blood pressure meds filled they gave me a different brand, it was the same thing but just a different generic company that it come from. Pharmacist said he would trade them out and didn't think it was the problem but we could rule that out before going back to Dr if needed.
I keep getting dizzy feeling, not like I'm gonna fall or anything but ... fuzzy ... sluggish, which makes me not want to do anything. I came home from work last night at 5 and laid down for a few minutes while my daughter made some dinner. I was about half asleep in that time. Got up enough to eat, for the first time since 8 that morning, and laid back down while I talked with her.
I had a friend call me that she was up at the football field watching her grand kids workout so I went up with her. I was only there for about 30 mins about feel asleep in that time. Came home from that, did very little and laid back down to watch TV around 9:30 feel asleep again and woke up around 11 when my daughter came in. I sat up an talk with her boyfriend and my son for about 30 minutes and was out again. I don't know maybe I have been just trying to push toooo much into my days. Last time I felt that way I had a sleep time like this.
The part that bothers me is on top of all that I really feel uncomfortable. The med that they changed also worked as a diuretic, and I mean it WORKED, and this one does not. I had been feeling really bloated and didn't know why but I think it's probably from this.
Today is going to be a busy day. My daughter starts her first real job and I am really happy for her. I am going in this morning to work some much needed overtime and then I plan on hitting the gym and have her to work by 4. Tonight my sons girlfriend will be coming in town. This will be the first time I get to spend any real time getting to know her. I am really looking forward to it. From what contact I have had with her she seems like a really sweet girl. She make my son happy too so that's a plus :D
Well alarms are going off around the house meaning that I need to get ready for work. Hope everyone has a super day
Saturday, August 18, 2012
Monday, August 13, 2012
8-13-12
So the last few days have been much better. Sundays are a normal gym day after church I got for a longer workout. Today I had a two hour break between my regular hours and the time I could work overtime and I hit the gym. It wasn't a long workout but it was better than what I have been doing the past few months.
I wish I could say the weekend was a good one but in some ways it was really not. I did manage to get some cleaning done around the house. Not as much as I would have like to but done just the same. I was ok with it since I didn't ever go to the gym on Saturday like I had planned on.
Yesterday after the gym came home and took a nap an started on some house work again. Really wanting to get my kitchen where I can paint it by Labor day weekend. It been getting pushed aside for to long. I can hear those calories burning off as I climb the ladder :D
My foods today was over in range even though I had a late dinner, which I ended up eating most of my calories for the day. I really had intended on just coming home after work but my daughter wanted to stop for something to eat and I found myself ordering something too. Even at that point I planned on only eating half of it and saving the rest but realized I was more hungry that I realized. At least I had some gym time to make up for it, not that I am using that as an excuse to do it all the time.
I am going to try and do the gym tomorrow but I don't know. Tomorrow would have been my moms birthday and I am making a trip out to the grave at some point. We'll see how that goes. Then again may a walk after to get my mind clear wouldn't be to bad of an idea. Hope that all is doing well. Catch me later :D
I wish I could say the weekend was a good one but in some ways it was really not. I did manage to get some cleaning done around the house. Not as much as I would have like to but done just the same. I was ok with it since I didn't ever go to the gym on Saturday like I had planned on.
Yesterday after the gym came home and took a nap an started on some house work again. Really wanting to get my kitchen where I can paint it by Labor day weekend. It been getting pushed aside for to long. I can hear those calories burning off as I climb the ladder :D
My foods today was over in range even though I had a late dinner, which I ended up eating most of my calories for the day. I really had intended on just coming home after work but my daughter wanted to stop for something to eat and I found myself ordering something too. Even at that point I planned on only eating half of it and saving the rest but realized I was more hungry that I realized. At least I had some gym time to make up for it, not that I am using that as an excuse to do it all the time.
I am going to try and do the gym tomorrow but I don't know. Tomorrow would have been my moms birthday and I am making a trip out to the grave at some point. We'll see how that goes. Then again may a walk after to get my mind clear wouldn't be to bad of an idea. Hope that all is doing well. Catch me later :D
Saturday, August 11, 2012
8-11-12
So I never made it to the gym today like I wanted to but I feel like I got a workout in. The dreaded fridge cleaning. Ya know where the kids have spilled stuff under the drawers and try to pretend it didn't happen? Well it was pretty this time. MAJOR sticky stuff.
An the place under the counter on the floor ... the spot that they kids feel is not part of the floor that needs sweeping or moping? I was on my hands an knees trying to reach that spot. I am just glad I was home alone for once :D
I know it's not as much as if I had gone to the gym but at least I didn't just sit at home and do nothing. Tomorrow I will keep in with my Sunday routine that I started last week. I am taking my gym clothes with me so that when I get outta church I won't have an excuse to come home. I got in 1.5 hrs on the bike, but never went to the weight room. I didn't know what was going on with my ankle and didn't want to put to much pressure on it. Tomorrow will be different. Stationary bike and weights. I got this :D
I had, in my mind, made plans that I really thought I could pull off. I wanted to move my day up a few hours and hit the gym at 4am. YES I said 4 AM!! I know it sounded crazy and I may still do it, but my schedule just won't let me get in all I need and get to bed at night. So I am going to try ... REALLY try to do this in the evenings. I AM going to take my gym clothes with me so that when I get off work, even if I work overtime, I will have them and get in at least a lil time in the gym. If don't work overtime I will be off at 4 .. ahhh pm and WILL make myself go to the gym. I can do this. I know I can.
So the next big project is rearranging the living room. It's been a while. I am sure I will have plenty of alone time to get it done. That will be a good workout :D Maybe after I get home from the gym tomorrow :D
Well not much else today ... I'm tired and need my rest if I am going to do all I want to do tomorrow ... I'll let ya know how it goes ... I will at least make it to the gym.
An the place under the counter on the floor ... the spot that they kids feel is not part of the floor that needs sweeping or moping? I was on my hands an knees trying to reach that spot. I am just glad I was home alone for once :D
I know it's not as much as if I had gone to the gym but at least I didn't just sit at home and do nothing. Tomorrow I will keep in with my Sunday routine that I started last week. I am taking my gym clothes with me so that when I get outta church I won't have an excuse to come home. I got in 1.5 hrs on the bike, but never went to the weight room. I didn't know what was going on with my ankle and didn't want to put to much pressure on it. Tomorrow will be different. Stationary bike and weights. I got this :D
I had, in my mind, made plans that I really thought I could pull off. I wanted to move my day up a few hours and hit the gym at 4am. YES I said 4 AM!! I know it sounded crazy and I may still do it, but my schedule just won't let me get in all I need and get to bed at night. So I am going to try ... REALLY try to do this in the evenings. I AM going to take my gym clothes with me so that when I get off work, even if I work overtime, I will have them and get in at least a lil time in the gym. If don't work overtime I will be off at 4 .. ahhh pm and WILL make myself go to the gym. I can do this. I know I can.
So the next big project is rearranging the living room. It's been a while. I am sure I will have plenty of alone time to get it done. That will be a good workout :D Maybe after I get home from the gym tomorrow :D
Well not much else today ... I'm tired and need my rest if I am going to do all I want to do tomorrow ... I'll let ya know how it goes ... I will at least make it to the gym.
Sunday, August 5, 2012
8-5-12
oh my oh my where to start? Maybe I should title my blog "where to start" guess it would get some attention huh? lol
So today was the first day in toooo long that I spent time in the gym. I have been doing my time with my trainer an he usually kicks my butt but other than that no real gym time. I have however come up with a new game plan. I know it's crazy and some will think I will never do it, and I am not sure if I can pull it off, but I am going for it.
Since I do best, when I have to go to work, to get in a morning workout I need to make this change. Since I have been going in at 7am instead of 9 I had talked myself outta going in the mornings. I convinced myself that I couldn't get in a good workout like I wanted so I would sleep in an go in the evenings. This has NOT been happening. A few weeks ago I even took my gym bag with me to work and I WAS going to go when I got off work BEFORE I came home (lets face it once I'm home that's it most of the time) and they offered overtime at work. Money is so limited with me most of the time that I had to take up the offer. Only problem by the time I got off work: 1. I was REALLY tired from working a 12 hr shift, even if it was sitting the whole time. 2. The gym I usually go to would be closing in about an hour, and I still had to get there.
So what is my plan when I am on a limited time space? Getting up at THREE am. Yes you read that right. I am going to do a trial run with Planet Fitness for the next month. This gym is open 24-7. Its just up the street from my work. I can do this, right? Sure I can. I was getting up an being at the gym at 5 when I worked the 9 oclock shift so I just move my whole day up 2 hrs. Sounds good in my head, the only thing that will keep me from doing it is if the Dr stops me.
How? Why? you ask. My ankle is not getting better. I took it easy for a bit. I even laid off taking the stairs .. some what ... it just doesn't feel right standing waiting on the elevator any more. I know it's crazy. I can't believe those words would ever flow from my mouth much write them on paper, but it's true.
The last session I had with my trainer we worked upper body and it was a good workout but I just feel like I am missing something. I know I need to read the signals my body is sending me but that is a good an bad thing. It's been a while since I have felt this uncomfortable in my body. I feel like I am going backwards. This is NOT what I want. So I am going to listen to my body an when it hurts I will back off and change up. At the same time I can't just sit down and do nothing. The lil extras have been come my exercise and that HAS to change. The parking at the back of the lot is to get in some extra steps not meant to "make me feel good about doing something". I have to get in a real workout and "feel the burn".
So wish me luck. I am going on my lunch tomorrow an sign up for at least the $10's for one month to do a test run. I can talk about this all day. I can think about it. I can plan it but this is going to take some getting use to. It's going to take some discipline that I have to do. I HAVE to do this. It's time to stop talking about it an get back to doing it. I am not at the goal yet and I REFUSE to fall back. I can do this. Step back and watch me.
So today was the first day in toooo long that I spent time in the gym. I have been doing my time with my trainer an he usually kicks my butt but other than that no real gym time. I have however come up with a new game plan. I know it's crazy and some will think I will never do it, and I am not sure if I can pull it off, but I am going for it.
Since I do best, when I have to go to work, to get in a morning workout I need to make this change. Since I have been going in at 7am instead of 9 I had talked myself outta going in the mornings. I convinced myself that I couldn't get in a good workout like I wanted so I would sleep in an go in the evenings. This has NOT been happening. A few weeks ago I even took my gym bag with me to work and I WAS going to go when I got off work BEFORE I came home (lets face it once I'm home that's it most of the time) and they offered overtime at work. Money is so limited with me most of the time that I had to take up the offer. Only problem by the time I got off work: 1. I was REALLY tired from working a 12 hr shift, even if it was sitting the whole time. 2. The gym I usually go to would be closing in about an hour, and I still had to get there.
So what is my plan when I am on a limited time space? Getting up at THREE am. Yes you read that right. I am going to do a trial run with Planet Fitness for the next month. This gym is open 24-7. Its just up the street from my work. I can do this, right? Sure I can. I was getting up an being at the gym at 5 when I worked the 9 oclock shift so I just move my whole day up 2 hrs. Sounds good in my head, the only thing that will keep me from doing it is if the Dr stops me.
How? Why? you ask. My ankle is not getting better. I took it easy for a bit. I even laid off taking the stairs .. some what ... it just doesn't feel right standing waiting on the elevator any more. I know it's crazy. I can't believe those words would ever flow from my mouth much write them on paper, but it's true.
The last session I had with my trainer we worked upper body and it was a good workout but I just feel like I am missing something. I know I need to read the signals my body is sending me but that is a good an bad thing. It's been a while since I have felt this uncomfortable in my body. I feel like I am going backwards. This is NOT what I want. So I am going to listen to my body an when it hurts I will back off and change up. At the same time I can't just sit down and do nothing. The lil extras have been come my exercise and that HAS to change. The parking at the back of the lot is to get in some extra steps not meant to "make me feel good about doing something". I have to get in a real workout and "feel the burn".
So wish me luck. I am going on my lunch tomorrow an sign up for at least the $10's for one month to do a test run. I can talk about this all day. I can think about it. I can plan it but this is going to take some getting use to. It's going to take some discipline that I have to do. I HAVE to do this. It's time to stop talking about it an get back to doing it. I am not at the goal yet and I REFUSE to fall back. I can do this. Step back and watch me.
Thursday, August 2, 2012
8-2-12
Don't even know where to start ... hhmm seems I say that a lot these days. Yeah it's been a while since I wrote, guess I'm kinda fallin down in a lot of ways. Well at least the ones on my journey.
The only thing really positive that I have been doing is going to training. That's only 30 minutes. Well that's not totally true. I just haven't made any extra effort to hit the gym and I really need to. I have lost my motivation. No it's not that. I just ... well I guess the depression has hit me.
A year ago I was basically watching my mom starve to death. This was a tough month for me last year and I guess it's not going to be the same for a long time, if ever. Mom's birthday is this month too. Or I guess I should say it would have been. I can't believe that in just a month she will have been gone for a year.
Some days I just feel lost. Today seems to be on of those days. I know she's not up in heaven thinking about me. It's a blessing to know she isn't lonely any more. She not in pain any more. She's happy. I just wish sometimes that she were able to think about me. But if she were to be able to then it would cause pain an sadness and there is none of that in heaven. I just miss her a lot right now.
Tonight, of all the other things that popped her in my mind, I opened my phone to send a text and some how her contact info had opened. I hadn't opened it but I guess when I closed my phone I hit it or something. I don't know ... it was the point that broke me. All I could do was cry. I wanted to hold her again and hear her voice just one more time. Some times I listen to voice mail that she had left on my phone ... do you ever do that? Have something that you can hear a loved one on an just listen knowing it's going to hurt but you just want to hear their voice?
So as far as my journey it's at a stand still. I need someone to kick me in the butt and get me started again. I know a lot of the things I need to be doing, I just can't get myself doing it this past few weeks ... actually months. I am letting everyone down that has been following me ... if anyone still is ... I'm sorry. I keep saying tomorrow ... I know I know tomorrow never gets here ... that's what makes me mad at myself. I'm just having a pity party I guess. I'll get over it soon ... nite all
The only thing really positive that I have been doing is going to training. That's only 30 minutes. Well that's not totally true. I just haven't made any extra effort to hit the gym and I really need to. I have lost my motivation. No it's not that. I just ... well I guess the depression has hit me.
A year ago I was basically watching my mom starve to death. This was a tough month for me last year and I guess it's not going to be the same for a long time, if ever. Mom's birthday is this month too. Or I guess I should say it would have been. I can't believe that in just a month she will have been gone for a year.
Some days I just feel lost. Today seems to be on of those days. I know she's not up in heaven thinking about me. It's a blessing to know she isn't lonely any more. She not in pain any more. She's happy. I just wish sometimes that she were able to think about me. But if she were to be able to then it would cause pain an sadness and there is none of that in heaven. I just miss her a lot right now.
Tonight, of all the other things that popped her in my mind, I opened my phone to send a text and some how her contact info had opened. I hadn't opened it but I guess when I closed my phone I hit it or something. I don't know ... it was the point that broke me. All I could do was cry. I wanted to hold her again and hear her voice just one more time. Some times I listen to voice mail that she had left on my phone ... do you ever do that? Have something that you can hear a loved one on an just listen knowing it's going to hurt but you just want to hear their voice?
So as far as my journey it's at a stand still. I need someone to kick me in the butt and get me started again. I know a lot of the things I need to be doing, I just can't get myself doing it this past few weeks ... actually months. I am letting everyone down that has been following me ... if anyone still is ... I'm sorry. I keep saying tomorrow ... I know I know tomorrow never gets here ... that's what makes me mad at myself. I'm just having a pity party I guess. I'll get over it soon ... nite all
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